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As Seen on Mulhawny Drive (flash fiction)

July 18, 2013

Bike against tree by AnElephantCant

It was almost too much to bear. First that thing, then a near heart attack, now pesky little brother questions? Other kids folded under less. Mario chugged water, wiped his mouth, tried to catch his breath, and said, “I told you. It came out of a garage. Don’t know why it ran after me. It saw me and growled and came after me. All scaly green and crazy hair and long, long teeth clashing together like knives. I rode my bike as hard as I could back home. All I can say is, I ain’t going anywhere near Mulhawny Drive.”

 


Friday Fictioneers prompt given by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. For other stories inspired by this photo, click here.
Photo copyright AnElephantCant
Story copyright Dave Williams

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15 Comments leave one →
  1. July 18, 2013 7:49 am

    I don’t understand why little brothers can’t let you catch your breath before they start with the questions.

  2. July 18, 2013 8:40 am

    Funny, very funny!

  3. petrujviljoen permalink
    July 18, 2013 8:57 am

    … and scary.

  4. July 18, 2013 3:09 pm

    A bike escape would be harrowing unless the creature was slow.

  5. July 18, 2013 3:45 pm

    Sounds like Mario was late for dinner and in need of an excuse. Good story.

  6. July 18, 2013 6:12 pm

    Captures the voice of the child well.

  7. July 18, 2013 6:13 pm

    I think you should have made it Mulhawny Street. Then you could have said, ala Dr. Seuss, “And to think that I saw it on Mulhawny Street.” 🙂 I bet he was pedaling faster than any of the guys on the Tour!!

    janet

    • July 19, 2013 6:54 am

      Funny you mentioned that — at first, I was going to simply title it “Mulhawny Drive,” but I thought of that Dr. Seuss book and decided to spice the title up a bit. I didn’t want the title to be too close to Seuss, so I kept the drive. Thanks for coming by and reading!

  8. July 18, 2013 7:28 pm

    Great childhood drama!

  9. July 19, 2013 9:27 am

    Loved it!

  10. July 19, 2013 12:00 pm

    I like the way you developed the story, feeding up details slowly until it was all told. Very realistic voice. Ron

  11. July 19, 2013 2:15 pm

    Otherworldly creepiness entrenched in real world relations – awesome!

  12. July 20, 2013 4:46 pm

    Dear Dave,

    You captured the voice of a boy annoyed with his brother. I could hear him and even see freckles. Fun.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

  13. July 23, 2013 8:13 am

    little brothers can be pretty annoying. i have 3. ^^ great story, the story, bicycle and the monster reminded me of comic books ^^

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